Saving S.W.O.R.D. (Or How I Learnt To Worry A Lot & Be Part Of An Internet Campaign

AAAAAARGH WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON I DON'T POST ON MY SITE THAT'S RIDICULOUS WHAT ARE YOU DOING READING THIS GO AWAY YOU ALL SMELL OR SOMETHING!

..... phew. I am at peace again... OH SH-

WAIT WAIT I HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO WRITE ABOUT PAY ATTENTION I LOVE YOU ALL ESPECIALLY THAT GUY WHO SMELLS LIKE POO! STAY AND READ! AND LEARN!

Okay? Okay.

YOU aren't reading S.W.O.R.D.. I specifically mean you. Yes, you with your copies of sub-par series like Uncanny X-Men, Hulk or Dark Avengers. You aren't reading S.W.O.R.D. and the world hates you for it. How can anyone expect comics to progress as an art form when you swan around buying whatever mainstream adolescent crap that you love out of some freakish love for self abuse and a profound joy found in being oblivious to anything that's genuinely brilliant. You fuck.

Of course if you buy S.W.O.R.D. disregard all of that preceding nonsense. Instead of taking that abuse just tell EVERYONE you know to buy S.W.O.R.D.! It's a decent first action before you do your part to save such a brilliant gem from cancellation.

By now you either know what I'm on about, are offended horrifically, have fucked off, or are wondering why I'm going on about S.W.O.R.D., whatever the hell that may be.

Well, I'll tell you. S.W.O.R.D. is a brilliant series spinning out of Whedon's Astonishing X-Men (remember how good that was? This is better) and forming itself in the aftermath of both Secret Invasion and Beast's leaving of the X-Men (remember those plot points? This is better), written by the amazing Kieron Gillen (of Phonogram, Beta Ray Bill: Godhunter and THOR fame) and illustrated by the inimitable Steven Sanders. It follows the organisation of the same name and their wacky misadventures up on the Spire, their bigass satellite space station. More specifically it's about Abigail Brand and her stern kinkiness, Beast and his quirky loveable sciencist...ness, Lockheed and his drunkenness, Sydren and his bit-roleness, Unit and his would-probably-skin-you-after-tricking-the-fuck-out-of-you-in-a-very-evil-wayishness and Henry Peter Gyrich and his being SPACE NICK GRIFFIN..ness.

Oh and it has Death's Head in it. Which is AWESOME!

The first three issues are out at the moment and they've thrown some brilliant plots into the mix already, between Death's Head hunting the half-brother of Brand (on her father's side, so he's all green and furry), Sydren trying to stall for time in a meeting with people who want to take all of our women-folk or some such thing, a mysterious spooky signal that no-one bothered to investigate and Henry Peter Gyrich trying to get every alien forcibly removed from Earth. Now, ALL of these plot points get suitable airing, with character moments galore throughout. This juggles balls better than any comic about. Heck, it juggles balls better than the best Jongleur in all of France!

And yet, it isn't selling more than a few thousand copies each issue. Because people are ignoring it for one reason or another. And ALL of those reasons are BAD REASONS. Especially that one about Beast looking so different. I mean he's ruddy adorable! JUST LOOK AT HIM:
Actually Brand looks quite nice there too...

Anyway, all I've done is ramble in expository and aggressive manners. But that's the problem here, it's THAT good that it's incredibly hard to know where to start making it sound as good as it really is. I'm not a comic writer (yet) and don't have the tools neccesary to eloquently talk about comics as well as normal as I'm in the middle of a big brain fart or something that makes even writing a guest post for another site a never-ending task of writers block and the like. It's easy enough to rant on twitter about how awful a comic is or something, it's just hitting my head against a wall. But when it comes to trying to describe all the reasons that a comic floors me straight up with the sheer power of awesome I'm stumped. So just trust me when I say YOU need to be buying this series.
Ah, nothing like some good banter between characters to prove that it's awesome.
AND if you already are there are ways to show your support for this series.

• First up is to tell people you know to buy it. It's a simple idea and creates a chain effect that would lead to far better sales with enough luck and willpower. And if you know them in person you can show them an issue you own to tease them into it.

• The second way is to jump onto twitter and talk about how awesome it is to all your followers and adding #savesword to your tweet. Or if you're feeling experimental you can make your statements more intricate by living the wonderful existence granted to a freelance peace-keeping agent and #talklikedeathshead when you are promoting the brilliance of the Sentient World Observation and Response Department.

• The third (and I'm weirdly fond of this one) is to go to Nerderyblog and print out the PDF files contained on the page linked to, fill them out and send 'em off to show your love for S.W.O.R.D. the only way people know how to: with a love heart and a furry guy.

So that's my incredibly scatty piece on one of my favourite series (and the ONLY Marvel ongoing I am guaranteed to buy each month) that I thoroughly encourage you to buy. As does everyone's favourite Freelance Peace-Keeping Agent:


-Flip the Page OUT! (to hide and never update)